thedemonmagnet: (21)
[personal profile] thedemonmagnet
This was not a conversation Xander wanted to have and it took everything he had to put one foot in front of the other as he made his way to Spike's cave. He didn't think anything could be worse then the conversation when Spike's son was born, but at least then he hadn't been afraid of loosing Spike. Now...now he didn't know what to think and honestly, he wouldn't blame Spike at all if he wasn't his choice. It was Buffy and Xander knew how much Spike loved her. It wasn't like they'd expressed anything close to that to each other so...

Taking a deep breath, Xander tried not to think about it while at the same time preparing himself for the conversation ahead as he called out, "Spike?" once he neared the entrance of the cave.

Date: 2009-10-16 02:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
"...Yep," Spike answered from behind him, almost right in his ear. He'd been out walking and smoking when he saw Xander making his way to the cave, and it hadn't been terribly difficult to catch up to him.

Date: 2009-10-16 02:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
Xander screamed a very not manly scream and he flushed bright red with embarrassment as he turned around to look at Spike. "Spike! Jesus! You need to find better forms of entertainment then stalking people in the dark!"

Date: 2009-10-16 02:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
Spike took a step back, holding his hands up and chuckling. "Wasn't stalking," he promised, shaking his head in amusement. "You need to relax a bit." His smile turned almost predatory as he eyed Xander and added, "Bet I've a few ideas on how to do that..."

Date: 2009-10-16 02:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
Now there was an idea...

"Buffy's here." Xander blurted out, his hands up between them, before he lost his nerve and he knew that if he moved even an inch towards Spike he'd lose it in favor of Spikey-goodness.

Date: 2009-10-16 02:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
Spike's eyes widened in what was not panic, but certainly some measure of concern. "Here? Here in the cave, here? Have you talked to her? Did she seem..." Okay, there was nothing he could say there that wouldn't be suspicious, "...odd?"

Date: 2009-10-16 02:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
Xander blinked and gave him an odd look.

"What in the island's name are you talking about? She just got here today and she's back in her old room in my hut. And yeah she was talking odd, she was from my future so their was some miscommunication at first and are you okay?

Date: 2009-10-16 03:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
Spike just stood and stared for a few seconds, taking all of that in. Not the Buffy-bot, then. Which meant... "She's back," he whispered, reaching for his smokes. "Bloo-dy hell." That complicated things, didn't it?

Date: 2009-10-16 03:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
And that is what was important wasn't it? Buffy was back. "Yeah." Xander replied in a similar whisper. He bit his bottom lip, unsure how to say what he needed to say next.

Finally, after hugging his arm to his chest, he said softly, "She's from a little before you, same general time just without the whole end of Sunnydale part. She wasn't even shocked I had two eyes." It was a start.

Date: 2009-10-16 03:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
Spike nodded as he lit up. "Right. From..." He sighed, wondering just exactly when she was from. A lot happened in a short time, right there at the end. "Did you tell her I'm here?"

Date: 2009-10-16 03:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
There it was. The light in Spike's eyes that Xander remembered from when Buffy had been here last. It took everything he had not to sink more into himself, needing to get this over with first. "I did, but I don't think she really got it. The whole island thing is really throwing her."

"Spike," Xander paused to take a deep breath, "If Buffy is from when you and her... You could have that again. If you wanted. I'm sure if you talked to her...you could work something out." He wasn't making any sense but he was fighting the part that didn't want to. He was trying to do the right thing here.

Date: 2009-10-16 07:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
Spike didn't respond right away; he was trying to figure out just how to proceed, if he should talk to her or stay away, or..."What?" Xander's words finally sank in and Spike gave him an incredulous look. Even if he and Buffy had had something that was...well, bloody mutual, to start, that didn't mean he wanted to go back to it. "Don't be daft, Harris."

Date: 2009-10-16 11:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
"I'm not being daft!" Xander replied indignantly, yet unable to look at Spike while he spoke. He couldn't bare to see the love in his eyes. "You love her. I mean...she's Buffy." The reverent tone in his voice was hard to miss. "And I...I want you to be happy. So since she's back, if she's up to it, you should be with her."

It wasn't like they'd made any promises or declarations to each other. If anything, things had been awkward more then it had been comfortable, due to various things. But still...taking a small step back away from Spike was one of the hardest things he'd ever done. Xander didn't want to give Spike up but who was he kidding? If Spike had to choose between the Slayer and a just Scooby, why shouldn't he pick the better option? And it would be easier to just get it over with now, instead of prolonging the heart break. Not that Xander wasn't used to it of course but this time, he was okay with it. As long as Spike was happy.

Date: 2009-10-17 12:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
Spike rolled his eyes, dragging deep on his fag. "I was never happy with her, mate," he pointed out, shaking his head. Oh, they had fun, and he did love her--would always love her, in a way--but happy? Happiness wasn't in the cards for them, not together.

Date: 2009-10-17 12:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
That made Xander blink. "I...don't understand." How was someone not happy being with the person they loved? He'd been happy with Anya and Jill, when he'd been with them.

Date: 2009-10-17 12:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
"I loved her...but I wasn't happy. She wasn't, either." And furthermore, she'd never loved him. Not how he wanted, though in the end they'd had something. He'd have to talk to her, find out where she was from, where they were at in Sunnydale and where she wanted to be here--but right now there was a more pressing matter.

"Xander, you make me happy," he said slowly, patiently.

Date: 2009-10-17 01:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
Now Xander could only frown. He opened his mouth to say something along the lines of how could Spike be happy with him over Buffy, come on it was Buffy...but the words never came.

Instead, it was just a small, wondering "Oh." He hadn't seriously considered this possibility so now he was a bit lost for thoughts and words.

Date: 2009-10-17 01:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
"Yeah, 'oh'," Spike agreed with another little eyeroll. He sighed and gripped Xander's shoulders, leaning in and kissing him softly.

Date: 2009-10-17 02:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
Still not wanting to give into hope completely, Xander returned the soft kiss but kept his hands to himself. When he pulled back, he looked in Spike's eyes, asking softly, "Are you sure? Positively? I...don't think I could take if you changed your mind, even if I wouldn't blame you."

Date: 2009-10-17 08:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
"What d'you want me to do, handcuff myself to you to prove I don't want to go anywhere?" Spike asked, more exasperated than anything. "You're not my second choice, I didn't settle for you. I'm where I want to be. If you are."

Date: 2009-10-17 11:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
It was still hard to believe...once again he had to stress that it was Buffy here...but he did believe Spike. And to show him, Xander kissed him, softly and emotionally.

"I'm sorry," He whispered against Spike's mouth, "I just...I had to be sure."

Date: 2009-10-18 11:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
Spike wrapped his arms tight around Xander's waist, holding him close. "And are you?" he asked quietly.

Date: 2009-10-19 01:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
There was a brief hesitation but Xander nodded honestly. "Yes. I do." He closed his eyes as he leaned into Spike. Who could blame him for being afraid of losing this?

Date: 2009-10-19 06:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
"Aright, then." Spike sighed, rubbing his hand over Xander's back. He'd still have to talk to Buffy, sooner or later, but for now this was enough. "Want to come in for a bit?"

Date: 2009-10-20 01:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
Xander wanted nothing more then to spend the night in Spike's arms. But he knew that he couldn't leave Buffy alone her first night on the island. "For a little while? I left Buffy alone in the hut and I don't want to leave her for too long after just arriving..."

Date: 2009-10-20 08:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
Spike sighed but nodded. He didn't like it, would prefer to keep Xander all to himself, but...it was Buffy. That was really all that needed to be said. "For a bit," he agreed softly, kissing him again, just a little possessive.

Date: 2009-10-21 12:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] scoobys-heart.livejournal.com
"Thank you." Xander replied a bit breathlessly after the kiss that sent shivers down his spine. It was thanking Spike for understanding and putting up with him. "I'll make it up to you, I promise."

Date: 2009-10-22 07:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fangyandgrr.livejournal.com
Spike nearly told him that wasn't necessary, there was nothing to make up for, but he stopped himself and smirked. "See that you do," he purred, licking his lips as he towed Xander into the cave to take advantage of what little time he would get tonight.

Profile

thedemonmagnet: (Default)
Alexander Lavelle Harris

December 2020

S M T W T F S
  12345
678910 1112
13141516171819
20212223242526
2728293031  

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jul. 13th, 2025 05:19 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios